What happens when Ah Beng goes to night class??

This is a story of Ah Beng going to night class…..pls read below…..

One day during work, Ah Beng and Ah Seng were chatting:

Ah Beng: Ehhh Ah Seng, I've been taking night courses for 5 months now and I have an exam next week. I got a feeling I’m smarter and wiser now…..hahaha!! So you don’t Prey-Prey hah….

Ah Seng: Ohhhh!! Cun bor…..you go to night class then become smarter? Mai gong lar….people like you go night class for 1 year also no use!! Still stupid one lar!! Buahahaha….

Ah Beng: KNNB CCB…..you don’t look down on me worrr…Ma Hai!! You don’t believe izzit?!Okkkk….I ask you a question see you can answer bor?!

Ah Seng: Let your horse come larrrrr…….

Ah Beng: Ok I ask you, do you know who is Graham Bell?
Ah Seng: Errrrrr….mmmm…..don’t know lar….who ler?
Ah Beng: He's the inventor of the phone in 1876; if you take night courses you would know this. See….now you look like mountain turtle….Buahahahaha.

The next day, the same discussion took place:
Ah Beng: Oiiii…Ah Seng, I ask you another question. Do you know who is Alexander Dumas?
Ah Seng: Don’t know lar…..don’t know lar…..(sounds irritated)
Ah Beng: He's the author of "The 3 Musketeers", if you take night courses, you would know this. See I told you I’m smarter now….hiek hiek hiek hiek hiek....(snorts).

The next day, once again:
Ah Beng: Ehhh….Ah Seng….I asked you ahhh….do you know who is Jean Jacques Rousseau?
Ah Seng: CB…..don’t ask me all this stupid Ang Mo questions ok….how I know lar? (feeling offended)
Ah Beng: Aiyoh stupid….He's the author of "Confessions", I told you mah…..if you take night courses, you would know this.

This time, Ah Seng got really pissed and said: "Ok….then I ask you, do you know who is Simon Ching?"
Ah Beng: Simon Ching ah…..don’t know ler…..who ah…who ah?? Wahhh….you bue steady lar….secretly go to night class to learn this then come and ask me….naber!!!
Ah Seng: You idiot lar…..Simon Ching is the guy enjoying with your wife every night when you go to night class!! If you stop night courses, you would know this lar…..stupid!!


Buahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RICH DAD, POOR DAD (By Robert Kiyosaki)

Rich Dad, Poor Dad is a story about how Kiyosaki grew up learning life’s lessons from his real dad (the poor dad), and his friend, Michael’s dad (the rich dad). Poor dad was a PHD holder and the Head of the Educational Department in a teaching institution drawing a good pay, but retired with little money as he did not know how to make his money grow. Rich dad on the other hand dropped out in the 8th grade but managed to amass a fortune through buying businesses and investing.

The book is not a step-by-step guide to acquiring wealth. If you are hoping to become rich by applying these ideas, forget it. Read another. There are plenty to choose from in the market. It is more of a motivational book, one that sets out to change your mindset and your attitude. For example one of the lessons of the story is how ‘assets’ and ‘liabilities’ are viewed. An asset is something that puts money in your pocket, a liability is something that takes money out of your pocket. Unlike what most people think, Kiyosaki asserts that buying a house is a liability because it is not earning money for you. On the other hand, buying a business is an asset because it can make money for you. A dollar invested is a dollar earned. If it sets you thinking about how you have managed your money or how you are going to manage your money, then it has done a good job.

These are some of the lessons that can be gleaned from the book :

1. The poor (P) and middle class (M) work for money, the rich have money working for them.

2. The rich buy assets, the (P) and (M) acquire liabilities. What the (P) and the (M) think of as assets are liabilities: buying a house, buying a new car, new furnishing for the house, etc.

3. The rich get richer as they make their money grow and work for them while the P and the M continue to work for more money to pay off their liabilities.

4. Rich people explore opportunities and take calculated risks, the P and the M hide behind the security of their pay checks that blunt their desire ability to strike out on their own..

5. People who want to succeed surround themselves with successful people.

6. Wealth is measured by net worth, not by income. As Kiyosaki says, if you stop working today, how long can you survive? Your assets will continue to support you, your liabilities will kill you.

7. You can never have too much money.

8. Always make sure that your asset is more than your liabilities.

9. A house is not an asset, it is a liability. It does not generate wealth. Instead it eats into your income. Don’t be “house rich cash poor”.

10. Generating wealth is like planting a tree. Once its roots are firmly dug in, it grows by itself and provides you with shade.

11. A true luxury is one that you buy from the earnings of your assets, not from your credit card.

12. It is not how much you make that is important, but what you save and invest.

13. He who has the financial muscles makes the rules.

14. If you know how money works, you make money work for you, but if you don’t know how money works, you spend the rest of your lives working for money. If you fail, don’t blame others for your failures.

SEE! SEE! SEE! SEE!

Another joke to share with you guys before I post the next book review!! Enjoy yah!!

An elderly couple went to watch a contest for the strongest bull.

After the contest they went to the 3rd prize bull's owner, wanting to know what his secret was.

The woman asked; "How do you make your bull so strong?"

The owner said; "You have to make sure the bull makes love once a week."

The woman turned to her husband and said; "See!"

The old man was displeased but said nothing.

They then went to the 2nd prize bull's owner and the old woman asked the same question, to which the owner replied; "You must make sure your bull makes love 2 or 3 times a week."

Again the woman turned to her husband and said; "See! See!"

The old man was annoyed but remained silent.

They then went to the 1st prize bull's owner and again the old woman asked the same question. The reply was; "You must make sure your bull makes love at least once every day."

The woman turned to her husband and said; "See! See! See!"

This time the old man got angry and asked the owner; "But does your bull always make love to the same cow?"

The owner replied; "No, no. Many many cows."

The old man quickly turned to the old woman and said; "SEE! SEE! SEE! SEE!"

Buuaahahahahahahahahhaaaaaa!!!!!!!!

HOW THE CHINESE STAY PUT IN ITALY!!!

Sorry guys.....had been quite busy lately!! Got no time to update my post, but here is a joke that i wanna share with you guys before i post the next book review.


*** (Ah Pek is just an oldman in chinese)

About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Chinese had to leave Italy. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Chinese Community.

So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of the Chinese Community. If the Chinese win, they could stay. If the Pope wins, the Chinese would leave.

The Chinese realized that they had no other choice. So they picked a middle-aged man named Ah Pek to represent them.

Ah Pek asked for one condition to be added to the debate. "To make it more interesting", he said, "Neither side would be allowed to talk".

The Pope agreed. The day of the great debate came.

Ah Pek and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute.

Then the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.

Ah Pek looked back at him and raised one finger.

The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head.

Ah Pek pointed to the ground at where he sat.

The Pope pulled out a loaf and a glass of wine.

Ah Pek pull out an apple.

The Pope stood up and said: "I give up. This man is too good. The Chinese can stay."

An hour later, the cardinals were all around The Pope asking him what happened?. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the holy trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions."

"Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us." He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us."

"I pulled out the wine and loaf to show that God absolves all sin. He then showed me an apple to remind us of the original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"

Meanwhile, the Chinese community had crowded around Ah Pek.

"What happened?" they asked.

"Well," said Ah Peh, "First he indicated to me that all Chinese had 3 days to get out of here. I replied to him f*@k off and not one of us was leaving."

"Then he pointed that this whole city would be cleared of Chinese. I showed him that we are staying right here."

"Yes, and then???" asked the crowd.

"I don't know", said Ah Pek, "He took out his lunch, and I took out mine!!!"

-The End-